So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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