Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
