My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Randomize