How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
