He kissed a someone with a penis
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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