Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
YAS. BRING CRAB.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
