We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
