The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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