I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
