Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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