it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
