Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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