Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
Randomize
