You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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