Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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