2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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