I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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