I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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