I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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