Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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