Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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