Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
