There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
