yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
