will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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