If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
4 words: hood of his car
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
