yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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