everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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