I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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