I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize