I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize