Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I'm really busy with my period
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