My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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