Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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