I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Randomize
