And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
