I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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