did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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