Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
