Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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