last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
