I just pynch a tree in the face
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Congratulations! We have a period
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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