Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
