Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize