wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
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