I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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