um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
