She said her name was "party"
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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