Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
