So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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