# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i wish my penis had a tongue
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
